Congratulations, you’re expecting a baby! There is a lot to think about during pregnancy as you prepare for the upcoming birth and this significant life transition. New purchases are made while you start organising all the baby items in your house, sort out any leave from employment and begin the task of choosing your birthplace and care providers. Now is a good time to also think about your birth support team and how you will be set up postnatally once your baby is here.
You may be considering having a doula as part of your birth team – a wonderful addition who can help guide you on this journey and provide the physical, emotional and informational support that you and your family need.
As with many of the choices you will make throughout pregnancy, choosing a doula who is right for you might feel a tad overwhelming. After all, this is a vulnerable time, and you are inviting someone into your space. Every person who is with you during the birth and postpartum period will play a big part in your overall experience, so having the right support is important and worth some careful consideration.
Ask yourself
What are you hoping for from your birth team? What does birth and/or postpartum support look like to you? Think about the ways you would like your doula to support you. You may be particularly anxious about giving birth for example, and want to do lots of preparation ahead of time. Maybe you have other children who you want involved with this birth. You might wish for a doula to be with you throughout the entire labour including at home before moving into the hospital environment, or perhaps you would prefer hospital support only. Decide on what is important to you in the birth or postpartum space.
Do your research
There are so many wonderful doulas out there making a positive difference to the lives of birthing and postpartum women. Search on doula directories and ask around your circle of family and friends for recommendations. Many holistic health professionals will also know of doulas in their local area that they can recommend.
Meet with a few different doulas
Interviewing different doulas will help you narrow down your search and allows you to get a feel for their personalities and find who you connect well with. Many doulas offer an obligation free chat that gives you a chance to ask lots of questions and work out if you are a good fit for each other. Don’t be afraid to shop around – this is an investment into your wellbeing so it’s good to have some different options to choose from.
Ask your doula
Write down any concerns you have about giving birth, adjusting postnatally or even with hiring a doula, and bring these up in your doula interviews. This will help both of you understand your particular needs and whether you will be good fit for each other. Ask your doula what their beliefs and philosophies are around birth – does this align with your own beliefs and ideas? What would happen if there were an unexpected life event for your doula (such as a family emergency or sickness) at the time you go into labour? When is the on-call period, and how much contact will your doula have with you in the lead up to the birth? Jot down any other questions you have that could help determine if a doula is the right fit for you.
Make sure it feels right
As you research a few different doulas and chat with the ones you’re interested in, consider what personal qualities they possess that align with your own. Are they reliable, trustworthy, and honest? Could this doula support you with your birth wishes and through any concerns along the way? Is there a connection, and are you comfortable in her presence? Include your partner too and make sure they also feel supported by your doula. This is your birth journey, so it’s important that you feel completely safe with the people who will be supporting you.
At the end of the day, doulas provide much needed support and are passionate about the work they do. A doula will always have your best interests at heart and will work with you and your birth team to create a positive and peaceful space for you to birth your baby, helping pave the way for your transition into motherhood. Trust that your chosen doula is right for you, and enjoy the relationship you form together on this beautiful journey that will be yours to cherish and remember.